Monday, January 30, 2017

some of the wonderful gift you can always give to your partner


A gift-giving mentality becomes even more important as a relationship evolves — and some of the very best presents can’t be wrapped. They’re the thoughts and gestures that come straight from the heart and can transform a good partnership into a truly great one. “One thing that stands out in the research is that the actions you perform are the most important,” says Gay Hendricks, PhD, coauthor with his wife, Kathlyn.
Since it’s the time of year when presents are on everyone’s mind, it’s the perfect opportunity to transform your relationship from good to great — or from great to greater — by giving your partner these six very important gifts.
Each of us wants to feel loved by our partner and wants our partner to feel loved by us. The challenge for many couples, according to Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages (Northfield, 2010), is that the way one person shows love often isn’t the way his or her partner intuitively feels it.
One person, for example, may experience physical affection as love, while her partner experiences help with the household chores as the ultimate token of affection. They are, in essence, speaking different languages. “These miscommunications aren’t a matter of not having good intentions,” says Chapman. “They’re a matter of not touching the heart or emotions of the other person.”
also suggests asking yourself what you most often demand of your spouse. “The thing you have most often requested is likely the thing that would make you feel the most loved,” he notes. Here are Chapman’s five love languages:
Words of Affirmation. Some people experience love most directly through warm words, whether they’re verbal compliments or encouragements — anything from “I appreciate that you found a babysitter for tonight” to “I know you can run that 10K!” Whether or not words of affirmation are your primary love language, research suggests that supportive comments help couples develop a sense of “we-ness,” a feeling that enhances satisfaction with one’s partnership.
Quality Time. If this is your primary love language, you want your partner’s undivided attention. It’s important to you to have time together without distractions where you can nurture conversations and enjoy activities together. Quality time, according to Chapman, helps couples build reserves of positive memories, which are linked to increased marital stability and satisfaction.
Receiving Gifts. Actual presents have their place on the spectrum of relationship gift giving, too. The key to speaking this love language, however, has nothing to do with the price tag — it’s all about making your partner feel understood. This could be a store-bought bracelet or a beautiful rock you pick up on a hike or a watercolor you paint. These kinds of gifts demonstrate that you’ve been paying attention, and that you really see who your partner is and what she loves.
Acts of Service. This love language emphasizes doing things you know your partner would like you to do, from making dinner to changing the cat’s litter to paying the bills. These acts show your partner that you notice what’s going on in his life and want to help him.
Physical Touch. Backrubs, holding hands, deep hugs, kisses, putting your arm around your partner — for some people, physical intimacy is the signal of love and affection. If your primary love language is physical touch, nothing will say “I love you” more than being held or touched.
Bring passion back to touch by connecting emotionally as well as physically. You can do this by having each partner tune in to what touching feels like. He suggests taking turns deliberately touching your partner and noticing how it feels to touch and be touched. Do this experiment once when each person is tuned in to the experience and once when each person is tuned out. This helps both people understand the importance of really being in the moment, he says.
When both people focus on the same spot at the same time on opposite sides of the skin, it creates an electric sensation that is the byproduct of emotional attention.”
When author Laura Munson and her husband got married, their ceremony included a quote from the poet Rainier Maria Rilke, which read, in part: “A good marriage is one in which each partner appoints the other to be the guardian of his solitude, and thus they show each other the greatest possible trust.” Almost two decades of marriage and two children later, Munson’s husband began to have doubts about the marriage. But instead of begging him to stay, Munson took Rilke’s quote to heart and gave her husband the emotional space she felt he needed to reflect and reconnect with himself.
During an especially difficult stretch where her husband took up residence in another part of the house, Munson focused on what she knew in her heart: that she and her husband had a solid, loving bond that could transcend his personal crisis. “If a person needs to reconnect with who they are, the greatest gift a partner can give is the gift of space,” she says. “It’s a refueling time.” Today, Munson’s bond with her husband is stronger than ever.
Munson’s story, which she recounts in her memoir, This Is Not The Story You Think It Is: A Season Of Unlikely Happiness (Amy Einhorn/Putnam, 2010), is a dramatic example of how powerful the gift of solitude can be. Giving your partner the gift of time not only helps repair relationships, as with Munson’s, but it can transform them from good to great. Time apart — whether it’s a night out with friends, a quiet morning alone or a solo weekend away — helps your partner get in touch with her needs, interests and priorities. And it allows her to more authentically share them with you.
Some solitude is healthy, but as with all things, balance is key. Too much can weaken a relationship by creating separate spheres of interest, which can lead to couples having less and less in common over time. After all, we tend to fall — and stay — in love with the person we have the most fun with. That’s why relationship expert Willard F. Harley Jr., PhD, advises couples to do the things they enjoy the most together. “Couples who spend their most enjoyable time together tend to have great marriages,” he says.
Giving each other the gift of what Harley calls “recreational companionship” benefits both giver and receiver by combining two important human needs: to have fun and to have a companion. Harley recommends spending most, if not all, of your recreational time with your significant other. Stumped about what to do together? To jump-start your imagination — and recreation — he developed the Recreational Enjoyment Inventory at www.marriagebuilders.com. It’s an extensive list of activities — from archery and astronomy to cribbage, croquet and gardening. Each partner ranks each activity based on his or her level of interest. When both people give an activity a high score, it’s one worth trying.
Nothing can sink a relationship faster than unrelenting negativity, says marriage researcher John Gottman, PhD, author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (Three Rivers, 2000). In his research at the University of Washington’s “Love Lab,” Gottman has found that successful relationships have a 5-to-1 ratio of positive interactions — compliments, loving glances, offers to help out — to negative gestures such as criticism and nagging.
Whether you nag or simply turn your back when your partner is talking, these negative gestures erode your sense of togetherness. Researchers have even found that eye rolling after a spouse’s comment can be a strong predictor for divorce.
To bring your interaction ratio in line with Gottman’s recommendation, try to become more aware of how often you’re criticizing your spouse. One way to do this is to create some kind of lighthearted stopgap when you notice critical commentary — put a coin in a jar, or create a silly code word to let your partner know you’ve caught yourself (or her) in the act. Then try consciously focusing on each other’s strengths instead. Criticism will be naturally tamped down, and that will give each of you more opportunities to feel successful, appreciated and loved.
Accentuating the positive in your relationship doesn’t mean you should ignore tough issues. It’s just that you need to do it in an environment that’s fortified with positive feelings and exchanges.
“There’s a big difference between asking for change and criticizing,” says psychologist Noelle Nelson, PhD, author of Your Man Is Wonderful (Free Press, 2009). “If what you want is more participation with the kids or the house, that’s fine. But you need to start out from the perspective that you respect your partner, and his way of doing things is as valid as yours.”
During the courtship and honeymoon phase, it’s easy to hang on your lover’s every word. “Being listened to in childhood develops our sense of self and is how we know we are important, and the same is true for adults,” says psychologist Jan Hoistad, PhD, author of the Big Picture Partnering blog and the book Romance Rehab: 10 Steps to Rescue Your Relationship (Sterling, 2010).
Unfortunately, when couples are together for a long time, it’s common to become less attentive — but with a little practice, you can renew your capacity for rapt listening. Hoistad suggests taking turns actively talking and listening at least four times a week for 20 to 30 minutes. Alternate which of you goes first and talk about something important to you, excluding well-traveled topics and hot-button issues as much as possible.
Be honest, but don’t just focus on what’s bringing you down. Hoistad recommends sharing personal successes and things you find exciting, rewarding and worth celebrating. Then, when it’s your partner’s turn, actively listen to what he or she has to say without interrupting. What’s most important, Hoistad says, is to listen with a readiness to give and take. “When we’re generous with others it creates such nice feelings,” she says. “And then the other person naturally starts giving back.”
Passion often gets sidelined as a marriage becomes more established, but there are far-ranging benefits to bringing it back, says clinical psychologist David Schnarch, PhD, author of Intimacy & Desire: Awaken the Passion in Your Marriage (Beaufort Books, 2009). For starters, tapping into passion helps us discover more about who we are, which allows us to share more of ourselves with our partner. “When we are the object of our partner’s passion, it makes us feel desirable and desirous,” says Schnarch.
Passion also improves relationships by making people more tolerant of one another. “When we think our partner likes us, we are much more forgiving of grievances, and we’re also more tolerant of the inherent nicks and bruises of being in a relationship,” he adds.
Good sex has other benefits, too. Orgasm increases levels of oxytocin, a hormone that boosts feelings of connection and trust. Higher oxytocin levels have also been linked to increased feelings of generosity, reduced stress and improved cardiovascular health. And sex increases self-esteem; a five-year study at the University of Texas found that one of the reasons people have sex is to boost feelings of positive self-regard.
If passion is in short supply in your life, Schnarch recommends these simple strategies:
Hugging to Relax. Most hugs last an average of four seconds, says Schnarch. Extending a hug to 10 minutes without the pressure that it should lead to sex can be a way to reconnect with your partner. “The focus of a 10-minute hug isn’t about holding your partner,” he explains. “It’s about putting your arms around your partner and calming yourself down. This calms the anxieties that separate people.”
Heads on Pillow. For many couples, it’s tough to transition from washing the dishes to rolling around in the sheets. That’s why Schnarch advises partners to lie in bed with their clothes on and face each other with enough distance so that you can clearly see each other’s faces. “Hold hands, look at each other, and stay there for 10 minutes,” he advises. Most people feel passion start to kick in when they’re relaxed and lying down.
Feeling While Touching. Many couples develop the habit of touching each other without really feeling each other. “It’s very irritating to be touched by a partner when their touch feels mindless, like your partner is not invested and you are being taken for granted,” Schnarch says.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

ways on how to approach and have a date with a girl that is shy

On this website, I will teach you guys how to meet and date a shy girl. Dating a shy girl is very beneficial to guys. Shy girls are intelligent, sweet, loving, caring, and most importantly, loyal girls. Guys ultimately want loyal girlfriends that can and will eventually become marriage material so a shy girl is the best idea. Shy girls are loyal and less likely to cheat, shy girls are charming and have great personalities, and they are not “loose” and are very ladylike.
How to Meet and Date a Shy Girl
How to Meet and Date a Shy Girl
Want to learn how to meet and date a shy girl?
So what do you do to meet and date a shy girl?
How do you approach the situation?
This article is strictly for the guys out there that are tired of the loud, obnoxious, and loose girls: for the guys that are ready to bring someone home to mamma. If you are not serious about dating a shy girl, please don’t read this article; if you are ready for the drama-free dating experience, then proceed.

Where to meet a shy girl?

Shy girls are not in nightclubs or bars. They will not be out at 2:00 a.m. or partying. A shy girl will most likely be in a coffee shop, library, parks, online, and in shopping malls. Get out in the world and make sure you focus on the daytime meet and greets. Most girls, shy or not, do not want to be picked up in a nightclub, they want to connect while the sun is out.

How to meet a shy girl and eventually date her:

Normally, the guy is supposed to approach the girl first. It is set in stone in history and this is what a shy girl prefers. A shy girl will not allow herself to make the first move because she may feel intimidated or feel inadequate, so it is up to the guy to initiate what he wants. A shy girl is usually timid, so you must get to know her by subtle interactions so that she can warm up to you. Regardless of how nervous you are, you must be able to approach the situation in order to “snag” the girl of your dreams.
shy girl memphis
Do not be shy to approach a shy girl!
When talking to her be sure to ask about her interests and what she enjoys doing. Most shy girls don’t date much because guys are usually seeking one thing, which is a turnoff. Find out about her dreams and be attentive and engaged in the conversation. Basically, you must really get to know her or she’ll become cold and “shy” away. Be confident, funny, witty, and interested. Most shy girls avoid eye contact and speak softly, so your job is to get to know her and let her know that she is able to open up and become comfortable with you.
Because shy girls are timorous, they are not expecting a guy to approach them with the intentions of dating, so with that being said, they will enjoy the effort and easily succumb. The confidence that she lacks will shine through you, thus allowing a connection to emerge. This connection will ultimately enhance the loyalty in your future relationship. Now you have learned how to meet to and date a shy girl!

Saturday, January 28, 2017

Reason why people always do things that they always love to do


Hating Monday mornings and living on paychecks is not the way to live life. Instead of lashing out at your current situation, you should see what you need to change your life.
We are not here to pay bills and die. We are here to live our lives joyfully, without worrying about anything (or at least minimize worry and fear)
When we do what we love we actually are more likely to be successful, happier and healthier.
If you don’t want to work a single day in your life, then you should start doing the things which you really love and make your living with that work.
Here I’m going to give you the top 11 reasons that why you should resign your job and do only the things what you love.
10 Reasons Why You Should Do The Things You Love
1. Because you will be more productive.
Doing what you love will make you more engaged and dedicated towards your work and you will feel more productive and enthusiastic in doing those things.
When you absolutely love your work, you won’t feel tired anymore, moreover, it will always be fun doing all the tasks. Hence, you will find yourself more productive.
2. Because you will always remain motivated.
Keeping yourself up for an extra hour, doing work vigorously, taking no offs are the signs that you’ll find in yourself when you’re doing things what you love.
It always gives you extra motivation to meet your goals, and when you do that, the sense of accomplishment is outstanding.
3. Because you will feel more fulfilled.
Even after achieving huge success in life, people often seek personal fulfillment and peace in their lives.
Your life is much more than getting paid and having fat paychecks. You’ll feel fulfilled only when you see yourself growing and grooming with your work.
4. Because you will never make excuses anymore.
We are good at making excuses. We always try to get off the tasks we have been assigned because we really don’t want to do unless we’re compelled to do.
But, if you choose the kind of work you want to do then you will never make excuses in your life anymore.
5. Because your work will not feel like a chore to you.
If you are only doing the things which are driven by your passion then it will never leave you in boredom. Because you’ve chosen this and it will not be a chore to you.
You will always enjoy doing your tasks and it will always be much easier for you to get even through the hardships.
6. You will push yourself to succeed even more.
If you work on the areas of your interests, you will always try to make yourself better and better every single day, which eventually will make you more successful in achieving your hierarchy ambitions in life.
Moreover, you will never need external motivation which will force you to work because you will always be up for the given tasks.
7. You will serve others better
If you’re going to work with all your heart in a particular task, you will find yourself a complete change human being. You will always try to serve better to your customers and colleagues.
After all, spreading and receiving love and happiness is all that we wish in our lives.
8. You will be always up for the new challenges.
Challenges make us strong and you will never avoid them if you really work with all your heart.
In fact, you will always be fascinated by them, because obstacles inspire us and they make us even stronger with the passage of time.
9. You will always find yourself Learning and Improving.
If you are passionate enough about your job, you are more likely to take interests in learning every aspect of it.
You will always find yourself learning and improving with the time which is definitely a good thing for the overall success for every individual.
10. You will become an effective leader.
Leading the team, taking bold decisions is what a leader does. When you love your work and you’re passionately grinding for it, people will see you working and they are more likely to follow you.
Without deep conviction for the work you do, you cannot convince anybody to work for you. If you are more engaged in your work, you’re going to become an effective leader.

steps on how to get a girl that you have been chasing for a long time


Telling your crush that you really like her can be quite daunting. Just the mere thought of rejection is enough to want to live a life of unrequited love. It sounds dramatic, but to the lovelorn this drama is a reality. Finding just the right time, place and circumstance to reveal your feelings is challenging, and when you are afraid, there is no time that just feels right. Instead, take the right steps to make the task a little easier.
Be yourself. Chances are, singing her a song in public sounds romantic, but may not be genuine for you. Don’t change the person you are. A “what you see is what you get” approach can be much more appealing in this situation. Instead of acting like you think you should, just act like who you really are.
Use a smooth approach. Compliments or small talk can be a foot in the door for your dating life. Tell her how great her new haircut looks. Let her know you like the new outfit or her new perfume. These simple things will make her heart flutter and can be more appealing than a direct approach.
Ask her out. See if she’ll be your date for a night on the town or an intimate dinner. If this girl is already a friend of yours, you have an advantage. You will know the things she likes to do, for instance the type of movie she likes. There’s nothing more attractive to a girl than a guy who cares enough to notice just what she likes and dislikes.
Tips & Warnings
Don’t get discouraged. She might not read the signals right away, or she may be just as shy as you are.
If it doesn’t work out, don’t take it personal. There are other prospects. Take time to get over it, and move on.

Friday, January 27, 2017

ways on how to arrange a date


When arranging a date, you want to keep in mind not only what your interests are, but also the interests of the other person. Before arranging the date, think of an activity that you both will enjoy. If she doesn’t like your suggestion, work together to find something that allows both of you to enjoy the date. If you’re on a budget, research different activities ahead of time to see which ones are inexpensive but enjoyable.
Surprise your date occasionally. For example, if your date has been talking about a certain concert that’s coming up but can’t afford the tickets, purchase the tickets and tell your date that you have a nice surprise. The surprise element adds excitement to a relationship.
Use your days off for dates. Sit down with your date and talk about what ideas you have for the day off. You may want to have lunch at a local restaurant, but your date wants to go swimming and play tennis that day. Compromise by starting the day off with the outdoor activities, then end the date with a nice restaurant meal.
Try new activities together. For example, if both of you never took arts and crafts classes and you’ve been interested in doing so, sign up for a day-long session at the community center. Then take the crafts you made together and use them as decorations in your homes. If the community center is sponsoring a couples’ cooking contest for a cash prize, plan what you want to cook for the contest and enter it.

Thursday, January 26, 2017

How to make your girlfriend to look happy and exited

A happy, committed, functional relationship requires time and effort. You have to take the time to understand who your girlfriend is as a person and make the effort to be present in the relationship so you both can be happy as a couple. According to the article “How Love Affects Your Health,” a woman in the company of a man she adores will feel happy, triggering the release of various hormones in her body, increasing her appetite, and doing all sorts of good things for the body and mind. You can elicit this reaction in your girlfriend one good deed at a time.
Listen. Choose to listen to her feelings during moments of conflict instead of waiting for an opportunity to prove a point or win an argument. Be willing to make the changes she requests when necessary and appropriate. When she’s talking, nod and give feedback to let her know that you’re listening. Allow her the chance to talk about her thoughts and feelings without judgment. When you listen to her, she’s more likely to listen to you in the future.
Cook dinner for your girlfriend. Instead of going to a popular restaurant, stay home and cook a simple spaghetti or ravioli dinner. Add herbs and spices for taste and pop open a bottle of white wine for added measure. If you’re unsure what to cook, ask about her favorite foods. You could also look up recipes or take a cooking class if your skills are a little rusty.
Introduce your girlfriend to new activities that she has expressed an interest in or a willingness to try.Plan a weekend excursion to a local camp ground or sign up for dance classes. Your girlfriend will appreciate the initiative. When you take the time to help her experience new things, she knows that you listen to her and that you value the things she wants to do in her life.
Pay attention to what interests your girlfriend and support those activities. If your girlfriend is an avid diver, surprise her with a therapeutic massage after a long day in the water. No matter what the activity is, show that you support her involvement and, if possible, give her gifts that relate to that activity. You can even join in with her and potentially learn a new skill when you work on crafts or hobbies together.
Maintain a friendly and respectful relationship with her friends and family. Invite her friends and family over for game night or host a pool party for everyone to socialize and mingle. She will enjoy being able to spend time with you as well as her loved ones. Women appreciate their many relationships, so you maintaining a good relationship with the people she cares about shows her that you’re invested in her happiness in different ways.
Apologize. When you own up to your mistakes, she knows that you’re invested in the relationship. Being humble enough to admit when you are wrong is a sign of respect. She will appreciate you being willing to talk about things like hurting her feelings and taking responsibility for your actions.

Exercise that you will do to transform your body and a good shape and flat tummy


Looking for some effective ways to transform your body? There are a few great exercises that will help you to reach your fitness goal. These exercises are easy but effective in strengthening your body along with burning unwanted calories. However, sticking to these exercises is not enough to transform your body, you should also eat healthy and get enough sleep regularly. Don’t waste your precious time doing other workouts, here are seven exercises that will help you transform your body in no time.
1. Jumping rope
When was the last time you jumped rope? Perhaps in your childhood. Jumping rope is a cheap and easily portable exercise that you can do almost anywhere. This workout burns more calories per minute than any other workout. Get jumping for a perfect exercise and plenty of fun. One of the best things about jumping rope is that you can do it with your kids. Moreover, jumping rope is a fantastic way to fit in a highly effective cardio session when you are on the go. Simply toss your jumping rPushups your carry-on and you don’t need to look for the nearest gym. So, who said jumping rope is only for kids?
2. Squats
The squat is a compound, full-body exercise that works more than one muscle group. This powerful exercise helps tone your glutes, strengthen your body and burn a lot of calories. To boost your calorie expenditure and raise your heart rate, you can try to do jump squats. Or stay in a squat hold with dumbbells in the hands to increase the resistance as well as feel the burn. Doing squats regularly is one of the best ways to transform your body as well as improve your physical health. If you sit all day at work or at home, you are at higher risk of serious disease. Why not do several squats whilst waiting for your dinner to cook, the kettle to boil, or your PC to boot up? Sometimes multitasking is a great thing!
3. Pushups
Unfortunately, many people avoid doing pushups since this exercise is a bit harder to perform, but it can do wonders for your body. There are plenty of different pushups that work the different muscles in the shoulders and arms. Try to vary your pushup style to lower your risk of becoming bored with exercise. Not only do pushups work the upper body, but also work the core. Do pushups a few days a week to help sculpt the arms and overall transform the body. Plus, pushups are good for your heart and cardiovascular health and this exercise helps to improve your posture. Just make sure you do them correctly – learn to do pushups with your back straight to reduce back pain and avoid straining your back.
The great news for all lovers of swimming and for those who are trying to transform their bodies – swimming is a super effective workout that will bring you astonishing results. Swimming helps strengthen your core and work different muscle groups. Swimming boasts numerous health benefits. It helps to reduce your blood pressure, strengthen your heart and improve your aerobic capacity. Plus, swimming is a wonderful way for your family to get moving and have plenty of fun together. Though, this exercise is not as portable as jumping rope.
5. Lunges
To tone the muscles in your legs try doing lunges. Lunges give you such amazing results because they isolate every leg individually, helping transform your body. To add some cardio and boost the intensity, do some jump lunges. I suggest you to do 3 sets of 10 lunges a day for the best results. Since lunges are a very effective workout for strengthening, sculpting and building a few muscle groups, why not do them every day? Even if you have a super busy schedule, you can still find time to do several lunges. Stop making excuses and start exercising to transform your body today.
There are many benefits of running. It helps to relieve stress, improve your heart health, reduce the risk of depression, burn mega calories and improve your overall health. Running can actually transform the body like nothing else. It builds strong, toned legs and makes them look thinner. I enjoy running, especially early in the morning, and I think it’s one of the best exercises to do every day. I always feel a great sense of accomplishment after my run. If you don’t feel like running, try jogging. Not only does jogging help to burn calories, it also helps to improve your overall health.
7. Cycling
A cycling workout is a foolproof way to get a great sweat and work your legs. Cycling is a wonderful exercise since you can push yourself at a higher intensity. It strengthens your legs, arms and back, encourages your heart to work more efficiently and aids in weight loss. Cycling is also one of the easiest ways to fit exercise into your everyday routine since it’s a great means of transportation. It gets you fit, saves you money, and is good for your health. Bring along your significant other or friend, or cycle solo, and ensure you get the most out of your workout.
So there you have it! The list of the most effective exercises that will definitely help you transform your body. Just make sure you do them on a regular basis to see the best results.

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Things you need to know before you have $ex with someone

Now you finally know…
How long to wait before s3x is a hotly debated topic that probably isn’t going away. But even still … how long are you “supposed” to wait? Maybe you went out with someone and your chemistry is UNDENIABLE. You instantly feel that attraction and your s3xual energy between the two of you is DYNAMITE. What are you supposed to do? End the date? Go where your body WANTS you to go?
Your brain is wrestling with your tingling body and you SERIOUSLY want to just go for it.
It’s the age old struggle — if you jump into bed right away you run the risk of screwing up something that could have real long-term potential. The s3x might be fantastic, but what if he ghosts you afterward and leaves you in a puddle of insecurity? What if she gets the wrong impression and pegs you as just another player?

You may find yourself wondering — if you wait and build an emotional connection before you have s3x, could it mean a better opportunity for something lasting?

On the other hand, if you do have s3x, you might wake up the next day and find that the two of you are blissfully bonded and completely at ease with each other. One night leads to a weekend together and then the two of you become inseparable. It happens!
Is there a magic formula for the timing of that first s3xual encounter?
How long is long enough? Do you have a hard and fast third date rule? What factors need to be present in your relationship to make you feel secure about sharing your body with someone?

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Things woman must do when they visit a guy they don't want to have $ex with


1.Wearing tight clothes
Another thing ladies do when they go visit men in their houses is to wear tight clothes that have restrictions. It would be pretty difficult getting them out of the cloth and it would give them enough time to allow sanity creep back in peradventure they got carried away.
2. Red flag shows up
Ladies know that men do not like hearing the fact that the red flag is on. Most men would be irritated seeing the blood bank of the girls when they want to sleep with them.
It is a natural turn off for men so ladies use it as a weapon and say they are on. Some even go on to wear pads just to prove it is real.
3. They would have a friend with them
Ladies do not like visiting men for the first time alone. They would rather go with one or two friends that would help them break the tension that could be around the place.
Having one or two other girls in the room apart from the main girl visiting would spoil the show for the men. Ladies can be sure nothing would happen then.
4. They avoid sitting on the bed
Many ladies avoid sitting on the b3d when they visit men as they feel they are falling into a trap. The b3d makes them more cautious and to avoid being tempted or lured into doing something they do not want to do at that moment, they would rather sit on the chair.
5. They receive calls at intervals
When ladies feel like they have stayed long enough in a place, they start to receive calls that would make the guys feel they need to be on their way. Some even become apologetic on the phone to make the guy feel they have to go somewhere immediately.
In some cases, girls put their friends up to this and make them call them at intervals just to prevent the guy from launching his s*x idea on them.
6. They focus on something
Another thing ladies do when visiting guys in their houses is to concentrate on doing a particular thing. Some place all their attention on books while some watch movies and do not give the guys the time to want to get personal with them.
7. List of house chores
Ladies avoid having s*x with men they visit by coming up with the excuse of leaving for their own house. Usually, the guy would try to persuade them and they would come up with the annoying list of things they need to do at home before their parents or guardians get back.
8. Stories that touch the heart
Sometimes, ladies cook up all sorts of stories that would make men pity them; they talk about how they have suffered one or two forms of abuse in their previous relationships. They act traumatized and this would naturally throw the men off balance.
It would after all be inappropriate for the guys to want to try anything funny after they have heard their heart touching tales.
9. They act edgy
Sometimes, ladies deliberately put up an edgy front when they visit men in their houses. They act uncomfortable and would be cold towards the guy till they leave.

Monday, January 23, 2017

Ways and signon how to know that you look more attractive to men


Intimate relationships can be very awkward and stressful for many people, especially in the early stages. One person will frequently develop stronger feelings than the other and it may be difficult to tell if your partner or romantic interest is attracted to you. If you’re in an early relationship with a guy or if you just see one across the room at a bar or restaurant, letting him know you are attracted to him is an important step in establishing a possible connection.
Make eye contact. If you’re looking down or away from him during conversation, he will likely think you are not interested in him or what he’s saying. Keeping eye contact shows that you are engaged in both his conversation and him as a person.
Smile at him.Smiling is a surefire indication that you both are attracted to each other. Conversely, a lack of smiling will likely be seen as a lack of interest and can end the conversation or flirtation.
Ask him questions about himself. This shows that you are interested in learning more about him.
Make light physical contact. Lightly touching his arm or shoulder during conversation is a subtle but definite sign that you are attracted to him.
Kiss him.if the circumstances are appropriate for it and you feel he will reciprocate.

Ways on how to know that he is madly in love with you



In some relationships, you can just feel that your man loves you. Yet, because love is an emotion, it has the ability to cloud your judgment. Finding out those important ways that men show love help you know if he’s in it for your heart.


He partakes in your favorite pastime even though he hates it. For example, he may hate to shop, but you, on the other hand, could live in a mall. To please you, he grits his teeth into a smile and goes shopping to make you happy.

He Makes You Feel Special

He makes you feel like you are the only one that matters by doing special things for you. According to Andre Cross, a relationship correspondent for the website Ask Men, when a man tries to romance you with things like soft music, candles or a massage, it is his way of showing you that he really cares.

He Cares About You

He asks how you are doing and genuinely cares about the answer. If he loves you, not only will he check in with you, but he will listen to you.

You’re a Priority

When you become a priority in his life instead of an option, he loves you. For example, he not only spends time with you when his friends are busy, but also makes you a priority in his life.

He Calls

If he calls you often just to share that you are consuming his thoughts, he loves you. If a man is not into you, he’s not going to be into calling you. The only reason a man won’t take a few minutes to call you is if you are not on his mind, according to Greg Behrendt, the author of “He’s Just Not That Into You.”

You’re Included in His Future

Everyone has a plan, so if you are included in that two- to five-year plan, he loves you. In addition, if he constantly makes statements like “When we buy our dream home,” as opposed to “When I purchase my dream home,” he sees you in his future.

You Are Not a Secret

He loves you if he has introduced you to his friends, parents and other family members. When a man shares your relationship with other people, it means he wants you to be a part of his entire life.

He Fixes Things

A loving man attempts to fix the problem when something is wrong. According to Steve Harvey, the author of “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man,” if you approach your boyfriend with a “situation that is fixable” but he does not try to fix the problem, the man does not love you.

His Actions

If your boyfriend drives 30 minutes to your home to dig you out of the snow bank a blizzard dumped on your car, without your even asking, he loves you. Men that love their partners do acts of service for them. Many men show love by providing and protecting those they care for.

His Eyes Tell You

A man may not tell you he loves you 10 times a day, but his actions might. If his eyes light up when you walk into the room or if he tries to quickly look away after you catch him staring at you, he loves you.

Friday, January 20, 2017

Ways on how to break up with someone that you are in love with

Tips On How To Break Up With Someone You Still Love.
To break up with someone you still love that is not making you happy is one of the hardest thing to do. It might be due to some certain reasons but nonetheless it always seems breaking up with someone you still love is the best choice. Recently i wrote a post that exposes the 9 amazing secrets to make your relationship last forever, you can read it here. Although sometimes trying to stay together will cause more pain.
Below are some very essential tips on how to break up with someone you still love and get over it quickly.
First you have to have to make up your mind that you really want to break up with him/her because the more you keep contemplating on the break up the more pain you causing yourself. Its advisable to note the reasons why you want the break up. Highlight the things you want in a relationship that you are not getting. Be true to yourself.
Now that you have made up your mind to break up with your partner, don’t rush!. You can start by first telling him/her why you think the relationship is not working, point out obstacles that you feel are affecting the relationship negatively. This way, your partner is likely to start looking forward to the break up.
Avoid making the common break up mistakes. Be sure to choose the appropriate time, place and mood to break the news to him. it is advisable not to break up at a rivate place where there are chances you could both end up having sex and then start looking forward to how to make it work again. A park or probably some hangout will be okay. you already have the upper-hand by being the ‘dumper’ but dont be too emotional. Just give your partner some time to digest the news.
Be sure to talk to your partner and give reasons for breaking up with him/her eventhough you are still in love.Be honest.
If there are properties that belong to both of you, be sure to divide them and also break up every thing that joins both of you together and be sure to over look some.
Give each other some time. Approximately a week or month then evealuate the decision together and see if it is a good idea to see each other as friends. Eventhough in most cases it doesnt work out but make sure you forgive each other and avoid resentment. Acknowledge the times you spent together and cherish the memories that comes with it.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Before we can prepare for marriage things you must know


As you prepare to enter into marriage, you will need to unscramble and negotiate all kinds of issues between you and your partner. Therefore, your first task is to see if you can unscramble the ten most important principles and ideas related to marriage preparation below. When you are done, Scroll down for the answers and to learn more about how you and your partner can prepare for this exciting event.
1. Three Stages of Marriage
2. Marriage Myths
3. Marital Satisfaction
4. Contexts or Environments
5. Individual Traits
6. Couple Traits
7. Change Yourself First
8. The Eighty-Twenty Rule
9. Change Your Heart
10. Seek Marital Therapy
1. Three Stages of Marriage: According to researcher and practitioner Jeffrey Larson (2003), most marriages go through at least three general stages of development: (1) romantic love; (2) disillusionment and distraction; and, (3) dissolution, adjustment with resignation, or adjustment with contentment. In the first stage of marriage, according to Larson, couples tend to be so caught up in passion and physical attraction that issues like sacrifice, selfishness, expectations, and crises are not faced or dealt with. When the honeymoon begins to wear off, then these issues begin to influence and impact the relationship. Daily-life stressors and other crises often occur that require sacrifices to be made, selfishness to be checked and given up, and expectations to be discarded or modified. Such disillusionments and distractions can lead to less time spent together, less time spent on the relationship, a reduction in a couple’s sex life, and sexual boredom. When a couple reaches the end of this second stage, according to Larson, they often feel disappointed and unfulfilled. It is then that a couple moves into the third stage with at least three options available to them: (1) They can dissolve the marriage relationship; (2) They can adjust while resigning to the fact that their marriage will not improve and that they will continue to grow apart; or, (3) They can work hard on their relationship and experience growing contentment and satisfaction as tools are gained, issues are worked through and resolved, and increased companionate and altrusitic love are developed with a little romantic love added to the mix. One of the toughest things for men and women to sometimes understand is that as the relationship develops and moves through these stages, intense and passionate love tends to diminish as it moves more fully into these other two styles of love – companionate and altruisitic love. Larson concludes by saying that every couple must make the decision whether or not they will dissolve the relationship, adjust in the relationship with resignation, or adjust in the relationship with growing contentment and satisfaction. His point is that many marriages could adjust with growing contentment and satisfaction if they would commit to recognizing their marriage needs help, become aware of strengths and weaknesses, understand the contexts that influence marital adjustment, gain the tools to improve traits that help or hurt the relationship, and commit to a plan for improving the relationship.
2. Marriage Myths: “Never go to bed angry at your spouse” or, “If my partner and I have a disagreement, our relationship is doomed!” are just two of the many myths that we can dispel before we ever get married. Sometimes, because we are tired and stressed, the best practice is to settle down and to get some needed rest before we deal with the issue the next morning. Other myths, according to Jeffry Larson (2003), include the following:
•”If my spouse loves me, he should instinctively know what I want and need to be happy,”
•”No matter how I behave, my spouse should love me simply because she is my spouse.”
•”I can change my spouse by pointing out his inadequacies, errors, and other flaws.”
•”I must feel better about my partner before I can change my behavior toward him.”
•”Maintaining romantic love is the key to marital happiness over the life-span for most couples.”
•”Marriage should always be a 50-50 partnership.”
•”Marriage can fulfill all of my needs.”(p
3. Marital Satisfaction: Larson and Holman (1994) have identified three general domains of important predictors of marital quality and stability (Note: Marital quality is defined by these authors as “a subjective evaluation of a couple’s relationship.” Marital stability is defined as “the status of the relationship as intact or nonintact [i.e., separated or divorced]).” These domains are (from least predictive of marital quality and stability to most predictive): background and contextual factors, individual traits and behaviors, and couple interactional processes (i.e., traits). Larson calls these three domains the Marriage Triangle. According to Larson (2003), the Marriage Triangle (see below) highlights these three domains and focuses on the interactions between them.
4. Contexts or Environments: Contexts and environments are the settings in which individual and couple traits are developed. These influential contexts are placed at the bottom of the Marriage Triangle because they form the foundation of the development of individual and couple interactional traits. Larson (2003) divides these contexts into two general domains – personal contexts and relationship contexts. According to Larson, personal context characteristics include family-of-origin influences, such as the degree of love and unity in the family in which you grew up, the quality of your parents’ marriage, and your degree of autonomy in your family-of-origin. Relationship context refers to the situation or environment in which your relationship currently exists. Examples of relationship context factors include support from in-laws, chronically unresolved marital problems, and stress caused by spending too much time or energy in raising children, dealing with financial problems, and so on. (p. 19)
5. Individual Traits: Individual traits that influence marital satisfaction or dissatisfaction include a person’s personality, attitudes, and skills (Larson, 2003). Larson identifies difficulty coping with stress, dysfunctional beliefs (see Marriage Myths above), excessive impulsiveness (e.g., impulsive spending, obsessive compulsive behaviors, etc.), extreme self-consciousness, excessive anger and hostility, untreated depression, and chronic irritability as the major liabilities toward the achievement of marital satisfaction.
Conversely, Larson identifies extroversion (i.e., sociability), flexibility, good self-esteem, assertiveness, commitment, and an ability to love as the major assets toward the achievement of marital satisfaction.
6. Couple Traits: Couple traits that influence marital satisfaction and dissatisfaction include communication (see Happy Talk: Keep Talking Happy Talk) and conflict resolution skills (see 9 Important Skills for Every Relationship) and several other traits specifically pointed out by Larson (2003) that include the following:
Cohesion – time spent together compared with time spent apart that leads to a perception and feeling of emotional closeness.
Intimacy – the combination of self-disclosure, affection, sexual relations, and cohesion.
Control or power sharing – “the ability to influence another person to go in the direction you want” (p.24). When there is give-and-take and the power and control is equitable and shared, then a feeling of satisfaction generally occurs. When one spouse tends to “exercise too much power or control in decision making”(p. 24), then dissatisfaction can occur.
Consensus – “the degree of agreement you and your partner experience on a variety of marital issues such as proper behavior in public, religious matters, decision making, and displays of affection”(p.25). Similarly, Larson states that “consensus can be realized in one of three ways in marriage:(1) you accept and appreciate that you are already similar,(2) you accept your differences without resentment or despair, or(3) you reach consensus through healthy conflict resolution”(p. 25).
7. Change Yourself First: Douglas A. Abbott (2003) shares three principles that can lead toward greater marital satisfaction: (1) Change your behavior: Change first; (2) Change your attitude; and, (3) Change your heart. He also includes three ways to change ourselves first as follows:
Exercise patience with your partner’s faults and annoying habits.
Drop the insistence that he or she must change
Take responsibility to change yourself and improve the relationship. The focus becomes you not your partner. You change first. Assuming there is good will and love between you and your spouse, your partner may then desire to also change. As you act in loving, forgiving, and benevolent ways, your spouse may reciprocate. (p. 3)
8. The Eighty-Twenty Rule: Dr. Abbott’s (2003) 80-20 rule was developed from a story he read several years ago called “80 percent I love you, 20 percent I hate you.” From this story he concluded, “to avoid overfocusing on the spouse’s negatives, you can train your mind to focus on the positives. Overlook the few small things(20 percent) that you don’t like about your spouse and continually remind yourself of the 80 percent you like”(p.4).
9. Change Your Heart: Dr. Abbott (2003) cites C. Terry Warner in his article who discussed the following about the need to change our hearts in our relationships:
A Change of Heart – “Without a change of heart whatever we do will carry the smell of manipulative, selfish, or fearful intent, and other people will readily discern it….The self-help movement that began in the latter half of the twentieth century suffers particularly from this flaw, for the personal and interpersonal skills it seeks to cultivate are almost always designed to get us more of what we think we want, rather than to bring about a change of heart” (p. 13). “To the extent that we can come to see others differently, we can undergo a fundamental change, a change in our being, a change of our emotions and attitudes, a change of heart” (p. 46). “We do not control the timing of a change of heart. We make ourselves available for it by faithfully doing the right things for the right reasons; that much does lie within our control” (p. 225). “There is no better means of promoting another person’s change of heart than allowing our own heart to change” (P. 176).
10. Seek Marital Therapy: Most relationships “get stuck” at some point and they need a little help (sometimes a lot of help) to “get unstuck”. Therefore, one of the best ways we can prepare for marriage is to overcome the stigma sometimes associated with seeking marital therapy. Couples who are proactive and who seek therapy early, before their relationship is falling apart, are wise.

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Reason why woman does not like $ex

Remember when you and your wife were dating? It was really difficult to keep your hands off each other.  You wanted her and she wanted you.  That felt so good.  It was awesome.  There’s no better feeling than being desired.  After marriage, and particularly after having kids, things have a way of changing.  You are still ready to go every night, but she’s not.  What happened?  You feel like you rarely have sex anymore and when you do it feels like she’s doing you a favor.
You work out, you look good, but it doesn’t make a difference.  You’re lost.  This whole married sex thing was supposed to be different.  Couples counseling might be something to consider for deeper insight.  However, these 5 Reasons Your Wife Doesn’t Want Sex will help you understand and show you what to do.
1. She Doesn’t Feel Connected to You.
While we feel more connected to our wives by having sex, our wives need to connect first.  You may have talked with her about daily logistics or superficial things.  She needs more.  She wants to be seen, heard, and known.  The disconnect causes her loneliness.  It’s like she’s trapped in a dungeon alone.  You need to free her.
Action:Talk to her about her. Find out how she is feeling, her insecurities, fears, and struggles. Also share how you are feeling.  Look at her–no distractions.  Get tunnel vision on her.  “Clear the mechanism.
2. She Doesn’t Feel Sexy.
Her body has changed since having kids.  She knows it and she probably thinks about it all the time, constantly comparing herself to other women.  Even when she returns to her pre-kid body, I guarantee she’s still comparing–desperate for affirmation.  The best place she can get it is from you. 
Action:  Affirm her.  She needs to feel your passion for her in your words, body language and eyes.  Tell her she’s sexy and why—particularly when she makes a negative comment about herself.  When you get home from work, greet her with a long hug and kiss before you greet the kids.  Look into her eyes and don’t be in a hurry to look away.  When you’re out, direct your eyes to her rather than other places.  Give her a look that communicates, in a room full of people, she’s the only one you want to talk to.
3. Her Sexual Appetite is Naturally Not as Strong as Yours.
Studies show that over the course of a relationship, a woman’s desire for sex decreases while her desire for tenderness increases.  The problem is that our desire for sex stays just as high as always.  Even at its highest state, her appetite might not have been as high as yours and probably never will be.
Action:Recognize this reality and be patient with her.  Reach out to her with physical and emotional tenderness.  That’s what she wants and needs.  Try to meet her needs before your own.
4. She is Tired, Stressed, or Depressed.
Motherhood is exhausting, emotionally draining and stressful.  Once again, depending on the depth of her anxiety and/or depression you may want to seek counseling.
 Action: Give her some rest.  Take the kids out for a day, run some errands for her, or clean the house. If she is stressed or depressed, rub her shoulders without her asking you.  Give her a foot or full body massage.  Tell her to kick back and relax.  Give her music to listen to and light some candles.  Take her tension away.      
5. She’s Focused on Being a Mom, Not a Wife. 
Women put a lot of pressure on themselves to be the perfect mom–to have it all together.  They beat themselves up for every little mistake or lack of knowledge.  They compare and can obsess on eliminating imperfections.  Sometimes our relationship as husband and wife gets lost.  That’s not good.  Your intimate relationship is important and needs her attention too.
Action: You need to talk to her about how you feel.  However, make sure you are not prosecuting or pressuring her.  Encourage her about how amazing she is as a mom.  Let her know though that you miss her, want her, and desire her.  It might even be okay to use the word jealous here.  Your biggest concern should be for more intimacy–a significant need for each of you